Radical Honesty : How to Transform Your Life by Telling the Truth by Brad BlantonThe first edition of Radical Honesty became a nationwide best seller in 1995 because it was not a kinder, gentler self-help book. It was a shocker! In it, Dr. Brad Blanton, a psychotherapist and expert on stress management, explored the myths, superstitions and lies by which we all live. And this newly revised edition is even worse! Blanton shows us how stress comes not from the environment, but from the self-built jail of the mind. What keeps us in our self-built jails is lying.
We all lie like hell, Dr. Blanton says. It wears us out...it is the major source of all human stress. It kills us. Not telling our friends, lovers, spouses, or bosses about what we do, feel, or think keeps us locked in that mind jail. The way out is to get good at telling the truth, and Dr. Blanton provides the tools we can use to escape from that jail of the mind. This book is the cake with the file in it.
In Radical Honesty, Dr. Blanton coaches us on how to have lives that work, how to have relationships that are alive and passionate, and how to create intimacy where none exists. As we have been taught by the philosophical and spiritual sources of our culture for thousands of years, from Plato to Nietzsche, from the Bible to Emerson, the truth shall set you free.
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If You Want to Change Your Life, Change What You Think
I sometimes tend to think of life as a battlefield—albeit, a metaphorical one, very different from the horrors of war. Can anyone deny that bloodless battles rage around us every day, often fought against familiar enemies that loom from the past? The cause of these everyday battle wounds vary: a bitter divorce, the loss of a loved one, financial problems, unemployment, health issues, and the list goes on and on. However, one thing is certain; these emotional casualties sustained on the battlefield of everyday life can be as devastating to your long-term well-being. The shrapnel of those explosive thoughts and words inflict emotional wounds that cause you to believe that you are being victimized and cheated.
The conversations you have with yourself have a direct impact on how you feel and how you behave. If your self-talk is filled with self-doubt , harsh criticism, and catastrophic predictions, you'll struggle to reach your goals. But you don't have to let a pessimistic outlook or foreboding inner monologue hold you back. You can train your brain to think differently. In fact, training your brain to think differently physically changes your brain. That's why so many therapists use cognitive behavior therapy CBT to help people create long-lasting change. CBT is a well-studied mental health treatment.
As many writers have found the act of writing is not only a wonderful tool to help you understand yourself, but can also be an incredible mechanism for personal growth. From the words or images bubbling up on the surface of your psyche, to the emotions and thoughts and stories lurking in the far reaches of your consciousness. As you reach inside and look for the right word s to best describe your emotions and thoughts, writing guides you to become clear.
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Why does writing down anything that comes to mind work?
I used to watch people on the streets and in restaurants and think that their boisterous conversations and broad smiles were evidence that they lived a life much better than mine. I assumed that they were happier than me, smarter than me, and worth more than me. All around me was evidence that this was true: my meager bank account, my junky car, my thrift store clothes. I wondered what it would be like to be someone who could afford to go to the movies and go out to eat, someone who bought new clothes and shoes, or someone who had a good job. Even imagining this seemed too hard. I felt as if life was stacked against me.
From doing the dishes to doing presentations and everything in between. The trick is not to write things down in order to sort out your mind — just write everything down indiscriminately. When you write it down, something takes over and the writing becomes more serious and more purposeful. In a short while the mind calms down and reorganizes. It probably because in the process of writing, feelings and emotions become clearer and hidden thoughts and feelings come to the surface to bring a more complete light to the situation.